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Forums > General Discussion   Shooting the breeze...

Happy St. Patrick's day

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Created by Clownfeatures > 9 months ago, 16 Mar 2013
Clownfeatures
SA, 205 posts
16 Mar 2013 2:41PM
Thumbs Up

A day early I know but I didn't think I'd be able to post tomorrow so to all you Irish,part irish or you know someone who is irish...OR like me your lucky enough to be born on March 17th AND married to an Irish girl have a good craic.
And a photo of what will be downed all over the world tomorrow ....Let the jokes begin..to be sure



theDoctor
NSW, 5784 posts
16 Mar 2013 4:34PM
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theDoctor
NSW, 5784 posts
16 Mar 2013 4:35PM
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the
Doctor

becomes....


warty mcknob


uncanny

Clownfeatures
SA, 205 posts
16 Mar 2013 5:37PM
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Greenie mcdoodles

Clownfeatures
SA, 205 posts
16 Mar 2013 6:10PM
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Clownfeatures
SA, 205 posts
16 Mar 2013 6:11PM
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She's Irish apparently .

Rupert
TAS, 2967 posts
16 Mar 2013 10:42PM
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So to celebrate St Patricks Day, a little bit of an Irish Song.



Paddy and Colleen walked past a swanky new restaurant last night.
"Did you be smellin the food?" Colleen asked. "Incredible!"
Paddy the nice guy that he is, turned to Colleen and said, "What the heck, I'll be treatin ya!"
So he turned her around and walked past it again.

There was this guy who was 1/2 Irish, 1/2 Scottish.
He wanted a drink but he couldn't bring himself to buy one.

Paddy O'Ryan walks up to the bar, sits gingerly on a stool and orders a whiskey.
When the bartender brings his drink he says "I've been drinking whiskey all week to cure my sciatica.
The bartender looks concerned and says "I've I can give you a better cure Mr. O'Ryan."
"Hush ya mouth ya heathen, I don't be wanting to hear it!"

An Englishman, a Frenchman and an Irishman were in a pub talking about their children.
'My son was born on St George's Day, 'remarked the Englishman, 'So we obviously decided to call him George.'
'That's a real coincidence, 'observed the Frenchman, 'My daughter was born on St Valentine's Day, so we decided to call her Valentine.'
'That's really incredible, 'drawled the Irishman, 'Exactly the same thing happened with my son Pancake.

Mulligan's answers to a general knowledge test in the local paper.
Who was half man, half animal? - Buffalo Bill
Who married Adam, apple is a clue? - Granny Smith
Complete this well-known saying: One swallow doesn't... - Make you sick
What was Gandhi's first name? - Goosey, Goosey

Be careful these Irish witticisms don't infect your computer with this Irish Virus.



Paddy returns home a little bit worse for wear and spies a letter lying on his doormat.
In BIG letters on the envelope it says on the envelope "DO NOT BEND ".
Paddy spent the next 2 hours trying to figure out how to pick the bloody thing up.

A construction site boss was interviewing men for a job, when along came Murphy. The boss thought, "I'm not hiring that lazy Mick..." so he decided to set a test for Murphy hoping he wouldn't be able to answer the questions, and he'd be able to refuse him the job without getting into an argument.
The first question was, Without using numbers, represent the number 9. Murphy says, "Dats easy" and proceeds to draw three trees. The boss says, "What the hell is that?" Murphy says "Tree 'n tree n' tree makes nine". Fair enough, says the boss.
Second question, same rules, but represent 99. Murphy stares into space for a while, then makes a smudge on each tree. "Der ya go sir" he says. The boss scratches his head and says, "How on earth do you get that to represent 99?" Murphy says, "each tree's dirty now! So it's dirty tree, n' dirty tree n' dirty tree, dats 99."
The boss is getting worried he's going to have to hire him, so he says, "All right, question three. Same rules again, but represent the number 100". Murphy stares into space again, then he shouts, "I got it!" he makes a little mark at the base of each tree, and says, "There ya go sir. 100." The boss looks at Murphy's attempt and thinks, Ha! Got him this time. "Go on Murphy, you must be crazy if you think that represents a hundred."
Murphy leans forward and points to the marks at the tree bases, and says, "A little dog comes along and craps by each tree, so now ya got, dirty tree an' a turd, dirty tree an' a turd, and dirty tree an' a turd, which makes a hundred, when do I start my job?"

May your glass be ever full.
May the roof over your head be always strong.
And may you be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows you're dead.

Happy St Pats Day.............

Mark _australia
WA, 22812 posts
16 Mar 2013 7:54PM
Thumbs Up

An Irish celebration that is yet another excuse for Aussies to go get ripped, have a fight, spew on the neighbour's lawn, drive p!ssed, whatever.

Just like every other "special" day

Yay. Not.

youngbull
QLD, 825 posts
16 Mar 2013 10:19PM
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Trying for a fast 10,000 hey Mark..

Mark _australia
WA, 22812 posts
17 Mar 2013 10:38PM
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youngbull said...
Trying for a fast 10,000 hey Mark..


No I just think that the Irish can celebrate their day, but no need for all the born and bred aussies to go get smashed too.

Don't think all the people in Ireland go get pissed on Australia Day do they?

Our drinking culture is becoming a problem.

Redthumbers must think it is a good thing ????

So lets add up just off the top of my head...

"We" (in general terms) get extra special pissed on
New Year Eve
New Year's Day races
Australia Day long weekend (special cos we also get to abuse other races)
Labor Day long weekend
Easter (don't believe in Jesus but believe in chocolate, grog and 4 days off)
Anzac day
Foundation Day
Queens Birthday
Melbourne Cup
Christmas
Own birthday\partner's birthday
Mate's birthday etc etc etc


Why add St Pat's day? From what I have seen it is just young fkheads getting pissed but with a green theme. Let's all get ripped on the 4th of July too!!! Why not?



youngbull
QLD, 825 posts
18 Mar 2013 12:55AM
Thumbs Up

For once Mark I think you are so wrong.

The days you listed just blend into my 365 days of extra special reason's. However I do steer clear of the woody silvers these days

youngbull
QLD, 825 posts
18 Mar 2013 12:58AM
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37 to go

Mark _australia
WA, 22812 posts
17 Mar 2013 10:58PM
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youngbull said...
For once Mark I think you are so wrong.



Hey what the...? so you agreed with me on everything up til now? I feel all warm and fuzzy.

Wheres the cuddle emoticon, gmail has one.

youngbull
QLD, 825 posts
18 Mar 2013 1:03AM
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southace
SA, 4783 posts
18 Mar 2013 2:01AM
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Also in the tropics we have cyclone party's. this involves drinking a slab of beer to celebrate the fact your getting belted by a cyclone!

Sailhack
VIC, 5000 posts
18 Mar 2013 11:50AM
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Mark _australia said...

Don't think all the people in Ireland go get pissed on Australia Day do they?



I'm guessing that those with Aussie heritage probably do...although I doubt that Fosters would be the ale of choice!

Actually, going from what the 'movies' teach us - the Irish are constantly p!ssed anyways!?!

Signed,
Peevish McSmelly.

doggie
WA, 15849 posts
18 Mar 2013 8:56AM
Thumbs Up

Mark _australia said...
youngbull said...
Trying for a fast 10,000 hey Mark..


No I just think that the Irish can celebrate their day, but no need for all the born and bred aussies to go get smashed too.

Don't think all the people in Ireland go get pissed on Australia Day do they?

Our drinking culture is becoming a problem.

Redthumbers must think it is a good thing ????

So lets add up just off the top of my head...

"We" (in general terms) get extra special pissed on
New Year Eve
New Year's Day races
Australia Day long weekend (special cos we also get to abuse other races)
Labor Day long weekend
Easter (don't believe in Jesus but believe in chocolate, grog and 4 days off)
Anzac day
Foundation Day
Queens Birthday
Melbourne Cup
Christmas
Own birthday\partner's birthday
Mate's birthday etc etc etc


Why add St Pat's day? From what I have seen it is just young fkheads getting pissed but with a green theme. Let's all get ripped on the 4th of July too!!! Why not?






+1 Australia Day is the worst

mattyjee
WA, 575 posts
18 Mar 2013 11:04AM
Thumbs Up

Im in san francisco at the moment, these guys put us aussies to shame as far as st. Pats celebrations go...

Pitbull
WA, 1267 posts
18 Mar 2013 4:55PM
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On St Pat's Day, there are two types of people - The Irish and those who want to be.

Buster fin
WA, 2585 posts
18 Mar 2013 5:57PM
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Mark _australia said...
youngbull said...
Trying for a fast 10,000 hey Mark..


No I just think that the Irish can celebrate their day, but no need for all the born and bred aussies to go get smashed too.

Don't think all the people in Ireland go get pissed on Australia Day do they?

Our drinking culture is becoming a problem.

Redthumbers must think it is a good thing ????

So lets add up just off the top of my head...

"We" (in general terms) get extra special pissed on
New Year Eve
New Year's Day races
Australia Day long weekend (special cos we also get to abuse other races)
Labor Day long weekend
Easter (don't believe in Jesus but believe in chocolate, grog and 4 days off)
Anzac day
Foundation Day
Queens Birthday
Melbourne Cup
Christmas
Own birthday\partner's birthday
Mate's birthday etc etc etc


Why add St Pat's day? From what I have seen it is just young fkheads getting pissed but with a green theme. Let's all get ripped on the 4th of July too!!! Why not?






You've blatantly forgotten Thursdays, Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays.

Clownfeatures
SA, 205 posts
18 Mar 2013 10:06PM
Thumbs Up

Geez I'm missing something ....some of you people are getting old....wtf....just a day for people to celebrate ......any way they choose.its not all about the drink you know......

Carantoc
WA, 6965 posts
18 Mar 2013 7:45PM
Thumbs Up

There is only one day to celebrate and that is the 16th May.

All hail - St Carantoc

Clownfeatures
SA, 205 posts
18 Mar 2013 10:22PM
Thumbs Up

Carantoc said...
There is only one day to celebrate and that is the 16th May.

All hail - St Carantoc


Never heard of him



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Forums > General Discussion   Shooting the breeze...


"Happy St. Patrick's day" started by Clownfeatures