One of my best friends from Europe is about become single and happy, because the misses doesn't understand he has to invest time and money in kitesurfing. He is away all the time.
Did you ever hear about anyone who went through this because kitesurfing is something his misses doesn't enjoy/understand?
I don't think it's that hard to please them both.
yep thats my world every day.
Mine has an inbuilt fun police. once i reach a unspecified amount of time spend on fun the rage begins....
problem is my acceptable level of fun is much higher than what hers is.
Men have an evolutionary drive to procreate with as many females of the species as possible and with this comes a propensity for violence. The female may only bear one child at a time and is programmed to find the best genetics possible including the need for support. This produces a greater propensity for a caring nurturing state. If you don't believe me read your farqing history books again.
Now when society and indeed survival takes this away men need to supplement this genetically programmed desire for something else. We still need to hunt but kiting is one means of directing and satisfying this primitive motive. How calm cool and at peace do you feel after a kite. Then the itch starts again. Both women anden have been fed this modern crap that we are all the same all equal. This then creates a discourse between their constructs in modern society and their programmed primitive motives. This creates the conflict. The solution. Not sure. Be a prick and survive.
If someone loses their marriage because of kiting, it's likely there are bigger problems at play. My suspicion is someone who hasn't grown up. If he is away all the time, then he probably hasn't grown up. If you're not spending time together, why are you married? If you want to kite every day, stay single and hire prostitutes, its probably cheaper and you'll get laid more often.
There are a lot of guys who never grow up, and it's not always a good thing to try stay young. Maturity comes with the territory and women don't like sitting at home alone with kids (if you have them). My sister went through the same issue. At some point in your life, you have to realise there are bigger things out there than kitesurfing and normally the arrival of kids is when most guys realise that.
Had a a discussion on the beach the other day, after what all 3 of us agreed was possibly the best session weve ever had, one of the lads mentioned it simply doesnt get better than that, to which i replied that was better than a root, honestly they replied with a question of doubt etched across their faces, so i came up with this senario, your waiting at home the forcast is looking epic, suddenly the breeze comes in the flyscreen door starts to rattle, the blinds on the windows start to sing a wind driven melody, its coming, another 20 mins pass the texts are coming with messages to confirm its ON, yo rush around loading your gear the tension is building, you go through your check list in your head, bar, lines, kite, pump,harness,board,rashy **** wheres the rashy, **** the misssus must of washed it, as you run into the bedroom to get it out of cupboard you notice the wife lying on the bed with your fave bit of lace on looking at you in a i want it now exspresssion
what do you do, we all agreed kite
well heres a woman's perspective........you guys need to get a life......... why on earth would you pick a mate thats not into the same hobbies as you....find a mate that likes to kite, windsurf and if not, at least watch whilst she/ he rollerblades in the carpark.. It seems a shame that sex and hobbies get muddled into the same basket here......but I won't even date a guy, once, thats not into sailing...... why waste your time........... who would understand....... constant .... sand in the bed...frizee hair and wind and sea obsession above all other irrelevant important matters..... such as cooking programs.... doing up the house, high heels, hair colour, dieting and a new car......... sail on....
Haha; why do all the male kiters struggle with this one?! :-)
Personally a non-kiting partner is the best! You don't have to argue over which spot to go to; nor for how long you go kiting for; who will fly what kite/use what board; who will get new kite gear that year; or in the case of kids, who will watch them and who will kite!
As to the issue that it is 'time consuming'. Learn to balance it, and point out that if you played a team sport you wouldn't have so much flexibility to go away on weekends (provided the destination has a kiteable beach of course!).
If you do sacrifice a day of kiting for the partner, make sure they know it, but DON'T blame them, say it is ok, your happy to miss a sesh for them, and you will go another day instead; and guess what you won't be in the **** if you go another day as you have earned some brownie points.
Also work out what times kiting will be good; if it's a typical 2-6pm seabreeze; slot that in as non-partner time each day. Get the partner into that routine; and they notice less.
If your partner is busy and doesn't know you've been kiting; don't tell them; then they won't know how much you do actually kite!
If your injured and shouldn't kite for a week don't let on; but maximise partner time so the week after you can kite more!!
Cheers Miss Jessie :-)
Have to agree that marriages don't break up over kiting / sailing, there will definately be other reasons.
Simple solutions:-
1/ learn to balance - they say everything in moderation; or
2/ stay single and do whatever the hell you want when you want.
I lean towards # 2
It's always been a main point of contention in my marriage. My wife has admitted she's envious of my passion for the ocean and wind.
Every session needs to be repaid by giving her free time away from the kids, which she'll burn by going out with her Gfs until 6am and then have a hangover the next day.
FML
A couple that plays together, stays together!
I have taught my husband how to kite (after a couple of professional lessons), and he has taught me how to surf.
Only problem is he likes kiting more than surfing now, and I love surfing more than kiting (just).
Wether we kite or surf, we just love being out in the water together and getting stoked together, nothing makes us more happier. It is real quality time for us.
If your going to teach your wife, husband or partner get a professional lesson or two first and when you take over teaching remember encouragement goes along way.
Old mate in the original post is obviously too self obsessed to care about anything else other than himself.
Good on you girls for wading in to this topic. I was starting to wonder whether it was only blokes that read it!
It sounds like a cliche, but there's stuff I love doing, stuff she loves doing, there is a bit of an overlap ( not kiting unfortunately) and you just make it work.
My wife often laughs that I'm a husband 0 to 15 knots.
But she does a passion for arts and other stuff that she pursues,with me in tow sometimes.
Nothing wrong with differences, it's accommodating them that makes or breaks.
Cheers
Take my hat off to you girls who have found the lure of ocean and wind. Want to know what I think. Well here it is. This is generalising as the girls have shown women to can find and pursue such hobbies. But guess what girls? You are in the minority. Most women I know have no real hobbies or a passion to follow. Their kids (you girls have kids"), you and organising every possible bloody minute second becomes their hobby! They don't understand a single point of focus, their focus is all over their holistically wired brains, hormones and body parts. They would rather and here it is...they would rather you be at home doing absolutely farq all, playing some god forsaken women's weekly idealistic family script, than out kiting. So you take off a session. You sit there.
You ask what now? And she turns on the telly or organises some of her moronic friends and their even greater moronic husbands to come around and bore you within an inch of your farqin life. You smile and just resist the pimeval urge to smash every stupid teeth in his neanthderthal mouth as pure bullsh1t flows seamlessly out of his cok sucking mouth.
I'm currently on holidays for eight long torturous days with my partner the kids and guess who? Her parents. Oh farq she is in heaven, sitting around like some dead head scene from the partridge family.
Choose your mate you say. Wish it was so damn easy.
The only thing that counters all my rhetoric is my kids. Life would have an even greater tone of existentialism without them. They are my life. That's the only thing that keeps me from falling into the primitive biological patterns I grained in our genetics I talked about before.
But I do say man or women. Know your rights as an individual, stick to your guns, and if your partner wants to bitch and moan ( men also, a lot of men I know are castrated pansies and the number is growing), let them. Do what ya gotta do,
YOU ARE NOT THERETO MAKE THEM HAPPY!
THAT IS an individuals responsibility. Suck it up. Go kiting.
Oh ****, they are playing scrabble now. SOMEBODY KILL MEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Sheesh Eppo, you are making me want to take a long hot bath with a sharp object
I feel for you, but I reckon you secretly enjoy scrabble
